[Chicago, IL] In a surprising turn of events, Dorval Carter Jr., President of the Chicago Transit Authority (CTA), has declared that CTA stations are the hottest new tourist attraction in the Windy City. Yes, you read that right! Forget about the world-famous museums, stunning architecture, and Lake Michigan's picturesque shores; the CTA stations are where the real action is at!

    In a press conference that left even the most seasoned journalists scratching their heads, Carter proudly announced, "We've decided to embrace our reputation and turn it into a positive. Chicago's CTA stations are now officially a must-visit tourist destination. Come see how we really don't move!"

    Tourists from around the world are flocking to Chicago, eager to experience the unique blend of frustration and stagnation that only the CTA can provide. "I've always wanted to see the world's slowest-moving train system," said one excited tourist from France. "It's like watching a snail race, but with less excitement."

    Local businesses are capitalizing on this newfound tourism trend. Street vendors have set up shop outside CTA stations, selling "I Survived the CTA" T-shirts, stress balls in the shape of train cars, and even "Delayed Train Bingo" cards to pass the time during those inevitable station standstills.

    Carter's decision has also inspired a wave of CTA-themed souvenirs. Gift shops across Chicago now stock miniature train cars that refuse to move and postcards depicting commuters locked in an eternal waiting loop.

    Chicago's finest dining establishments are getting in on the action too. One upscale restaurant is offering a special "CTA Experience" menu, featuring dishes that take longer to arrive at your table than the average CTA commute. "We pride ourselves on slow-cooked cuisine, but even we can't match the CTA's level of delay," quipped the chef.

    Local artists have embraced the trend as well, with galleries showcasing paintings of commuters frozen in time, waiting for their trains that may or may not ever arrive. One artist even created a performance piece where he stood motionless in a CTA station for 24 hours straight, embodying the essence of the CTA experience.

    Of course, not everyone is thrilled with the idea of CTA stations becoming tourist hotspots. Long-suffering commuters have mixed feelings about the influx of tourists crowding the platforms. "I just want to get to work on time," sighed one beleaguered commuter, as a group of tourists snapped selfies with a stationary train in the background.

    While some may see this as a quirky and tongue-in-cheek attempt to embrace the CTA's infamous delays, others are left wondering if perhaps it's time for the CTA to focus less on attracting tourists and more on improving the transit system. As the world watches Chicago's latest tourism trend unfold, one thing is certain: Chicagoans will continue to navigate the labyrinthine CTA stations, hoping one day for a train that arrives on time – but until then, tourists are more than welcome to join the party.